It scares me that some people can be on their third baby and are still not educating themselves on birth/the birthing process, and that there are people out there who put the hospital staff to such high standards when in most cases, the complications of birth are caused by the medical staff they put their trust into.
In all honestly, usually birth plans will not be followed because your doctor probably won’t show up until its time to have the baby. Just because your doctor agrees with what you want, doesn’t mean the nurses will, and they’re really the ones in charge. So its probably best to let them do whatever, so you’re not traumatised later on.
Some people have a whole list, some people don’t care what happens as long as they end up with a baby.
To me, that alone says you’re not ready to have a child. That you would rely on others for the well-being of your child. As a parent, we are the ones responsible for what happens to our children. We give birth to them and we watch them grow throughout life and make sure they stay safe. It’s not up to other people to make sure your child is either born safely or that they remain safe throughout their life.
A birth plan is a list of things you want during your birthing experience. A list of things you hope will be followed to a “T”, because you expect these people that you’re paying a ridiculous amount to actually care what happens to you or your baby.
I think mine went something like this:
I want to be able to walk around, sit in the Jacuzzi tub, etc and not be confined to a bed during labor (DR ok’d, nurses forced me to stay in bed)
I want to be able to push in whatever position (Dr couldn’t because she had shoulder problems, but I ended up pushing on my side, while being told by nurses not to push – doctor came in just in time to get the away from me)
I want to keep my placenta (it was thrown away)
No iv (Dr ok’d, nurses spent an hour poking me with needles even though I told them the exact vein to go for, they ignored me but eventually found it)
No drugs (obviously you don’t know what happens to your blood once they stick needles in you)
Nobody allowed in (circus was allowed to commence directly after birth to my horror)
No episiotomy (followed, since this is a Dr thing lol) but I did tear and she stitched it up and I haven’t had an orgasm since.
I should have added things like no bottles or pacifiers, no hat, no vitamin k shot, etc. However, I was one of those ignorant people who think that I’ll be asked what I want to happen, or that my wishes will be followed, my words be listened to. No better word to define this immaturity that people care besides “naïve”.
If my doctor caught babies in her office or made home visits I would stay with her for every birth, well I would have before I discovered that I am allowed to give birth NATURALLY. (Naturally to me: the way women have given birth for thousands of years before doctors decided to stick their noses where they don’t belong.)
Due to nurses at the birthing center, I will never give birth in a medical environment again. When you are educated in what’s supposed to happen during birth, what can happen, what might happen, the veil is lifted and you wake up and realise how jacked up your first time around really was.
And honestly, compared to a ton of women, my birth was perfect and my rights weren’t taken away half as bad as people who are forced into pitocin, drugs, and c-sections.